How have you been? I have heard so much about you recently, yet wonder what is on your mind. Your friends tell me that they miss you. In some cases, are grateful for you and even pray for you. Even your new friends tell me about their gratitude for you. Your parents miss you, but are incredibly proud of you. Some strangers even wonder why you are the way you are. They question if there is something different about you: either pointing to me or just your oddball personality. I would love to hear from you personally. All I want is to know where you are at, because, my beloved, I know you are struggling in ways you are struggling to comprehend.
I have heard about the maturity you have been growing into. It has been a process of the past few years; one that you struggle to acknowledge. But you have to understand, I am making all things new in you. Do not fret or try to conceal this, because I am making you new. In fact, I love your imperfections and cannot wait to help you understand them. Please hear this as I am proud of the way you have matured and you should be willing to acknowledge your growth.
Do you still pray for the youth? I miss our late night prayers, even though they were short. I miss you going to the high school whenever you passed by at night and praying for the students. While you may be 2,000 miles away from them and no longer passing their school, did you forget I know every single one of them by name? Miss our late night conversations and hoping we can get back to the roots. To be honest, I really just want to hear more from you. After all you are beloved by me.
Where have you been? I write to you, but I hear that you barely even open the letters. You call out my name every now and then. But I desire for an intimate relationship. Please understand that I am here for you whenever and as much as you need. Our relationship is not meant to be light or rare, but heavy and constant. All of this is out of love. I am here whenever you need me.
Call me whenever you are willing to uncover the unorganized habits persisting in your life, being late constantly, always trying to make it work, working really hard at giving to others, and anything else. We can both be honest that there is a lot more to a messy room or being late always. Or even your feeling about being able to make everything work. Or trying to pour so much into others. In all it sounds exhausting, please understand that there is more to it than surface level. Unpacking this and understanding how I can help will lighten the load. I do not mean to discourage (maybe keep your room clean), but rather help you understand lots of people have stubbornly tried to make everything work on their own. Sometimes I have given it to them, but other times I have not. In the end, these people have been exhausted from their efforts. Come to me, all who are weary, and I will give you rest. Let’s talk through this as I love what you are doing, but I am worried you will be left exhausted. Anyhow give me a call when you are ready to talk.
Salt Lake Fellows Collaborative