it was worth it.

I could write a blog post about everything that I have learned over these past ten months as a fellow, but in all honesty that would take too long and I don’t really want to do that.  I could also write a thank you to all of the Fellows and any one else who has impacted me over these past ten months, but I don’t want to do that either.

What I am going to say though is that it was worth it.  All the struggle, anxiety and loneliness that I encountered this year.  All of the belly laughs, movie nights, and shared meals. It was all worth it. Every high, and every low. Even those moments where I was forced to sit patiently in the grey of the unknown for what seemed like years.  It was worth it.

The struggle was extremely real this year, but I am glad I got to struggle with these ten people by my side.  I am glad that I got to struggle in a place that has completely captured my heart. It made everything easier. It was worth the pain and heartbreak. Those dark and stormy days that seemed to never end, it made it worth it knowing that there was always a shining face of a Fellow close by. Someone that I could talk to about my storm cloud. Knowing that there was someone out there that would accept me in all of my mess. It was worth it.

Knowing that every Friday night, there was something going on.  Whether is was attempting to build a fort, eating tacos for the hundredth time or just watching a movie. It was worth it.  Experiencing more charcuterie boards then I ever have in my entire life, it was worth it. Being forced to be social with required activities on the weekends, even when my introvertedness was trying to win.  It was worth it.

Those days where so many things seemed uncertain.  If I was walking towards the right career path. If I was making the right decision applying to graduate school.  The unknown of if the next step I was trying to take was the right one in so many different situations. Being completely uncomfortable not knowing or having control over the future. It was worth it.

I’m at a loss for words.  I have written and rewritten this blog post so many times. Trying to find the right way to describe what my experience as a Fellow has been.  Every time, I have simply come back to: it was worth it. And it truly was. Being apart of the Salt Lake Fellows, well, it was worth it.

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​Dana Dillon
SLF Class of 18-19